: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize