I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
