Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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