she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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