discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize