Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
