I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
