I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
