Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
