i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
