no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
