Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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