Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
