Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
The feeling are messing with the penis
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
