nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
