they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
