drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
