OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
