Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
