trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
And then he peed in my hair
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