Buhtt sex?
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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