Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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