I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Randomize
