Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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