The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I skipped work to stalk him.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize