nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
