Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
