Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
