i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
