I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
