apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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