lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
They have beer where we have blood.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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