I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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