i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
