two words: eviction party
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
