who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
