its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
