i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
