I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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