how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
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