Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
