Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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