somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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