The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
