But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
