OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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