"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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