Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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