the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize