Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Randomize