Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
